
Not achieving your goals? Here's how to fix it.
Aug 12, 2021Sometimes we feel like we understand everything there is to know about setting goals, but yet we still aren’t achieving them. (that was me!) Or we ARE achieving them and they’re still unsatisfying. If you want to start achieving your goals AND feeling good about them, watch this. (Article below.)
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ARTICLE
I know you’re working hard, but are you setting the right goals?
I’m not talking about SMART goals or STRETCH goals or some other system or acronym… this is about YOU and what’s right for your life. Maybe the reason you’re spinning your wheels is because you’re not setting the RIGHT goals for YOU.
I’ve always been an achiever. I got straight A’s, had an academic scholarship, was a mathlete… I’m a NERD and an achiever. I’d spent so much of my life successfully achieving that I was actually really bad at setting goals and I didn’t know it.
I understood all the acronyms and how to lay out a plan, but I didn’t realize all the ways I was sabotaging myself…
I procrastinated like it was my job.
I never wanted to push myself because I might risk failure.
I set goals that met other people’s expectations and not my own (because I wanted to please).
I spent years spinning my wheels and not making any progress. Don’t be like Past Mel! Instead…
1. Set goals that matter to FUTURE YOU
I spent a long time working on goals that mattered more to other people than to me. For example, I spent years saving for a baby before I realized I didn’t want a baby. No wonder that goal was so frustrating for me and I never wanted to save for it! Same thing with getting promoted at my job. I did it because I thought it was what I “should” do, but I didn’t actually like my job!
Instead of being like Past Mel, you need to…
Know who Future You is.
What does Future You do for a living? For fun? With friends? What kind of friends does Future You have? What kinds of things has Future You achieved and how does Future You feel about them?
If this kind of visualization is a challenge for you, be sure to download the FREE Becoming Future You Journal.
Once you have a clear vision, ask yourself: How does this goal bridge the gap between Present Me & Future Me?
How does it move the needle? How does it bring me closer to being the most authentic, most delighted, most in-love-with-my-life version of myself?
Once you start setting goals that actually matter to Future You and you can see the big picture, you’ll find that you’re naturally more motivated to do the work because you have some idea of where you’re going. You can picture what the payoff will feel like… and you want it, dangit!
If your vision for Future You isn’t that clear yet, don’t worry. Keep working on it and you’ll find more and more clarity.
2. Tackle the hard things first… the bigger gaps between Present and Future You.
Our lives seek balance. Many of my Unlock Your 5-Star Future students start the DIY Coaching Program because they want to improve one area of their lives (usually it’s their career). But in the first week of the program, we do a Life Review where I ask them to rate every area of their life from 1 to 5 stars.
Why?
Because it’s difficult to take your career from 4 stars to 5 stars if your most important relationship is at a 1 star. Think about the times you’ve had an argument with someone you loved and then been distracted for the rest of the day. It’s all one life and you can’t make one part 5 STARS AMAZING THE BEST EVER when another part is in the dumpster.
Ask yourself:
Which part of my life needs my attention?
Chances are, this is the part you want to work on the LEAST. It’s also the area that has the most room for improvement and setting a goal there will make a bigger difference faster.
3. Set goals that make you sprint
I recently started using the system laid out in The 12 Week Year by Brian Moran and Michael Lennington. Here’s the idea behind their system… a year is way too long. When we set annual goals, they’re so far out we don’t feel motivated to work on them. And we just set general targets instead of making a plan.
When we plan in quarters or smaller periods of time, we have no choice but to get a plan together FAST and start making progress right away.
This is why I like 2-week sprint goals. They keep me from getting distracted from all the shiny new ideas I have because there’s no way I can fit them into that 2-week period.
If you get distracted easily, try setting a 1-week or 2-week goal. And set it like you mean it! Really get the thing done and see if you let in as many distractions. (I know I don’t.)
Plus, when you achieve your 2-week goal, you get to celebrate! Yay! That’s a lot better than waiting all year to celebrate a goal you didn’t quite achieve.
THIS WEEK’S CHALLENGE
Review your current goals and ask yourself these questions:
- How will Future Me feel after I’ve accomplished this thing? How will my life be better?
- How does this goal fit into the big picture of becoming 5-Star Future Me?
- Which parts of my life need my attention? How can I set a goal in that area?
Then, take one of your bigger goals and turn it into a 2-week sprint goal.
You’ve got this!
Love,
Mel
Your 5-Star Life Coach ⭐️
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