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Trouble accepting help? Read this.

future you the author productivity self-care self-publishing Oct 17, 2021

Last week I emailed my mailing list when I was trying to decide which cover I should use for my book, Becoming Future You. You’re probably wondering which cover was the big winner, right? The answer is… none of them!

I got so much helpful feedback that I’ve decided to adjust course in a few ways:

  1. Several of you said, “Oh Mel… no.” So, I’ve hired a cover artist. I made the others myself and even though I love the pop art superhero thing, and the book is about being the hero of your own life, I know that look is not for everyone. I’m excited to see what my designer comes up with!

  2. Several of you said, “Mel, I see you’re targeting women…” and I thought, “Yes, but men would get a lot of out of this book, too! Men and women read my newsletter about becoming Future You every week and this book is just like that… Oh wait. I guess they won’t know it’s for them if I make it seem like a girl book.” So the blurb will be adjusted! Everyone deserves the opportunity to become the 5-Star version of themselves.

  3. Several of you said, “Mel, would you like help…” and I said, “Yes, please, thank you!” (Launching a book is a lot of work, as it turns out.)

Do you ever find yourself brushing off help? Even when you know you need it?

I used to be the kind of person who had to do everything myself and didn’t want to accept help from anyone. I was one of those, “I can do it myself” kids when I was little and that continued through adulthood.

It’s only been recently that I discovered, it’s okay to accept help! Not only that, when you let other people help you, they get benefits as well. For some people, acts of service or gifts are their love language and when you let them help you, you let them express affection for you in the way that suits them.

Not only that, when you relieve some of the burden off yourself, you become a nicer person to be around. (I grumpy when I’m stressed.) My husband is out shopping right now to buy the things he needs to DIY the little foam house my microphone is going to stand in while I record my audiobook. (It’s to improve the sound quality.) And I am so grateful for his help!  (Also, I’m so dang excited to be recording my audiobook! I’m recording the audio for a book I wrote! 🥰)

What about you? Is there something on your plate right now that you could use a hand with? Is it possible that someone has offered and you’ve brushed away their efforts because you can do it yourself? Could I build the thing for my mic? Yes. Will my husband build it just as well? Also yes.


Accept help. If no one offers, ask for it. If you’re like Past Mel and struggle to accept help, it’s something you’re going to have to practice. Even if you just let someone hold the door open for you this week, practice letting other people give you a hand. You deserve it!

Lots of love,


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